Chapter 9 Man Alone

More and more men are living alone. There are many reasons, but in this chapter, we will touch on just one, which is a widely accepted subject: feminism. The question posed to married men in A Wise Man's book was asking the men why they stood back and allowed the feminist philosophies to dishonor the woman’s role as wife, mother, and homemaker.

What I believe is the reason that men stood back was because most men were unsure of what a woman was created and designed by God to do and to be. "My people perish for a lack of knowledge..." (Hosea 4:6). As we see in today’s media-indoctrinated world, men are not men and women are no longer women. This has been part of the feminist movement’s agenda for years—to try and blend the roles and dismantle genders. We now have confusion and unhappiness in both men and women. The result? Homosexuality and lesbianism run rampant in our society, and the true God designed family has disappeared.

Part 1
Uniquely Created

Created for the man. People's opinions don't matter. God’s Word is what we can rely on because it has stood the test of time, no matter how much the world wants to deny it or "interpret" what God means. God said in the beginning, “There was not found a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:20). And then, “For man does not originate from woman, but woman from man; for indeed man was not created for the woman’s sake, but woman for the man’s sake” (1 Corinthians 11:8-9).

How can we possibly live God’s perfect plan for our lives‚ the abundant life God sent His Son to die for, unless we embrace what God says?

Created male and female. “And God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them” (Genesis 1:27). God says this very same thing, "male and female" in Genesis 5:2, Mark 10:6, and Matthew 19:4. This should help you conclude the truth regarding two genders, male and female. 

Let me interject that there's no reason to debate Scripture (2 Timothy 2:23-26). When anyone seeks the truth, God says he'll find it: "Seek and you shall find." He also says that the rest will look for someone to "tickle their ears" and find someone who says what they want to believe (2 Timothy 4:2-3). If someone asks you about a controversial heated topic, not to debate but to know the truth, "truth will set you free," then God says to share it humbly (1 Peter 3:15) and take advantage to sharpen your sword, “Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another" (Proverbs 27:17).

Masculine. Men were created to be masculine in how they act and how they look. Don’t be deceived by modern-day psychology into thinking you need to be more feminine or have a "feminine side." There's a difference between a feminine man and a gentleman. Webster’s Dictionary defines a gentleman as a man of high principles, honorable, and courteous—not feminine! The awful truth is that our society is rampant with effeminate men!

No, this isn't my opinion, be sure what I say is what God says, “Or do you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals... shall inherit the kingdom of God” (1 Corinthians 6:9). This goes for what anyone tells you: Go see for yourself what God says. Read above and below the verse quoted. Remember, God said to trust no one but Him to be blessed, "Whose trust IS the Lord" (Jeremiah 17:7-8)

Clothing. “A woman shall not wear man’s clothing, nor shall a man put on a woman’s clothing; for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord your God” (Deuteronomy 22:5). How we dress affects how we act and are perceived. When a little girl tries on a new dress, all her femininity bubbles up. She feels "girly" twirling around and dancing, and she's treated like a little girl. When a woman wears a pretty dress, she feels elegant, beautiful, and even romantic. Men can't help but be kinder and gentler. Clothes do “make the person."

Part 2
Become One Flesh

Leaves his father and mother. “‘For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and he cleaves to his wife when the two become one flesh. Consequently, they are no longer two, but one flesh. What God has joined together, let no man separate” (Matthew 19:5-6). God isn't just talking about physically leaving, but leaving your parents spiritually and emotionally when you transfer your loyalty from your parents to your wife.

And when a "wife" is spoken about, this does not mean a girlfriend or a fiancée. Due to the feminist movement, females have changed to wanting to be like men, and becoming as promiscuous (immoral) as most men, which is not the true nature of a woman. This is why, because it is her nature to be the way God created her to be, females are the ones who begin to address their boyfriend as "husband" or "hubby." Lying about having a husband means she is within her rights to be intimate. Same for men who are in the church and torn between living the ways of the world.

Proverbs shares a lot of wisdom regarding avoiding this pit. "The mouth of forbidden women is a deep pit; he with whom the LORD is angry will fall into it" (Proverbs 22:14). If your parents are wise, they will have warned you about “immoral woman, to keep you from the smooth tongue of a promiscuous woman. Don’t lust for her beauty," or she will "seduce you. For immorality will bring you to poverty. Can anyone take fire in his lap and his clothes not be burned? So it is with the man who sleeps with another man’s wife. He who embraces her will not go unpunished” (Proverbs 6:20-33). You may dismiss this warning because you are only intimate with single women. Isn't this missing the point? Immorality will burn and leave scars in your life.

Cleave to your wife. “For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). Cleaving is defined as “a desperate holding onto.” This is not happening today; many men leave their wives, and you might be part of your parents' destruction of your family. Now is the time, right now, today, to change your future. Make up your mind now to be faithful and stick to it. If you stumble, repent. Tell God, your Father, that you can't do it unless He does it through you. 

One flesh. Began as one, to become one. “So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh at that place. And the Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib, which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. And the man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man’” (Gen. 2:21). “And the two shall become one flesh; consequently, they are no longer two, but one flesh” (Mark 10:8).

Complete the man. God created the woman to help and complete the man—this is why you both must stay true to the way you were created, male and female. Puzzle pieces fit together perfectly, so, too, will the wife God created for you. This is also why you want to remain faithful before marriage, with no one interfering with how perfectly you will fit together when you find your wife. "For he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22).

It is an abomination. A physical “one flesh” can only be accomplished with a man and a woman. God created a void in a wife that was designed to be filled by her husband. God created us male and female to produce fruit (children) from our union. Homosexuality is a sin. It is an abomination to the Lord. Since the world continuously tries to pervert our conception of the Truth, we need to renew our minds often by reading what God says, so we line up with what is written by God. “You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; it is an abomination” (Leviticus 18:22).

Know what you believe because God says, “I hate those who are double-minded, but I love Thy law” (Psalm 119:113). “... being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways” (James 1:8). 

Protector. A key role as a man and husband is a protector. The moment a woman believes she can protect herself, she puts herself in danger, possibly mortal danger. It's another product of feminism because they foolishly believe they can or need to “fight their own battles,” and they believe they don’t need the protection from any man. Sadly, it's why the increase in women seeking the companionship of other women is because men's lust has become insatiable and dangerous. It's also why homicides and rape are rampant because they put themselves in harms way becoming vulnerable to attacks.  

An excellent wife, who can find? Most men, as was said at the beginning of this chapter, assume a woman is to fulfill one role only, for intimacy. Because with the blending of roles, primarily when women began to "choose" to work and now are "forced" to work, their husbands needed to take on the tasks of the homemaker. Therefore, men no longer have a wife in the home to take care of their physical needs by cooking, laundering their clothes, caring for their home, and bearing, nurturing, teaching, and training their children. Let's read what God says to get back on track.

“An excellent wife, who can find? If you can find a truly good wife, she is worth more than precious gems, the most precious treasure a man can find!! Her husband can trust her, and she will richly satisfy his needs, and she never lets him down. She is good to him every day of her life... She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household and plans the day’s work...She is energetic, a hard worker, and watches for bargains. She works far into the night!" (Proverbs 31:10-21). 

“That’s right,” you’re probably saying. “Who can find this excellent wife?” God can and will if you prepare now to be an outstanding husband. That's what I wanted for my sons, and by the grace of God, this happened for all four of my sons. It means relying on God to guide you and by putting your trust in Him alone. 

Provide.“But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith, and is worse than an unbeliever” (1 Timothy 5:8). Men who have a wife who works outside his home, the enemy will fulfill his agenda to divide your home and steal blessings. Choose not to fall into his schemes. “It’s my duty to make sure that the enemy does not win even a small victory over us, for we don’t want to be naïve and then fall prey to his schemes” (2 Corinthians 2:11).

Renew your mind with God's truth by reading it yourself, and you can take a different path in life. The reason why many women are so unhappy and frustrated is that they are trying to fill a role that they were not designed for—that of a provider. When both the husband and wife are working, who is in the home? What's the point of paying for a house or paying rent when you and your wife both work as slaves for a house that is sitting empty all day? Children then become burdens, not the “blessings” they are created to be, primarily because they will be cared for and taught by a poor imitation of your wife. More and more families are choosing the "traditional" way. They are content with fewer material things but living richer, more fulfilling, and comfortable ways.

Begin your training now, “Not that I speak from want; for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am” (Philippians 4:1). 

One wife. Let's close with the reason to be faithful to your future wife now, so that you can secure just one excellent wife. “So a church leader must be a man whose life is above reproach. He must be faithful to one wife. He must exercise self-control, live wisely, and have a good reputation, and he must be able to teach” (1 Timothy 3:2). “An elder must live a blameless life. He must be faithful to his wife, and his children must be believers who don’t have a reputation for being wild or rebellious. (Titus 1:6).

Christians are called to represent a picture of the Lord and His church. Separation and divorce hurt our testimony to a lost and dying world and a scheme that is working well to destroy the church and God's people. Wise Man Warrior, are you ready to fight back and show the lost world, through your example, that men were designed to be the husbands of one excellent wife?  Becoming one and living a happy, fulfilled life. “Consequently, they are no longer two, but one flesh” (Matthew 19:6). Fellow Warriors, I call on you to “Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you and rejoice in the wife of your youth” (Proverbs 5:18).