You Are Perfectly Beautiful

“You Are Perfectly Beautiful!!” 

"If you do not know,
most beautiful of women . . .
How beautiful you are, my darling!
Oh, how beautiful!"
—Song of Solomon 1:8,15

10-minutes total reading time

Did you see what God said to you, dear daughter? Did you assume He wasn’t speaking to you? Oh, how heartbroken it makes me feel—so I can only imagine how your Father and Creator feels.

It doesn’t surprise me, though. Today, more than ever, women, young and old, are continually bombarded by thoughts of how we fail to look like everyone else and how we never really feel pretty. We believe we are either too fat or too thin, too tall or too short, our noses are too long or too wide, and our skin is either too white or too dark—the list of things we can pick at is endless.

Let me tell you something that happened that’s helped me and what I love to share whenever God provides the opportunity. Years ago, while traveling to different parts of the world, I visited a continent known for producing many Miss Universe winners—more than any other country. The girls are sent to schools to learn how to win the title by grooming them on how to talk, walk, what to wear, etc.

What’s interesting is that no matter how gorgeous any woman is, even supermodels feel inferior, that there’s something not right, something she wants to change about herself!

Only a few weeks later, while flying to another continent, I had plenty of time to talk to the Lord about this, asking God for wisdom. “But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives it to everyone liberally, generously, without criticizing.” James 1:5. I began by asking Him for a way to explain to women and young girls of “every tribe and nation and language” how He sees them.

Interestingly, I was on my way to Africa, where my host family had set up a time for us to go on a real safari—His perfect plan. After that incredible experience, I understood how important it is to see ourselves and each other. *Please promise me to encourage at least one other woman you meet or know who needs to realize just how beautiful she is and share this analogy, this story with her.

The Lord said that He sees us as endangered, and we need His protection, just like all endangered animals. While on my flight, He asked me why people from all parts of the world spend hours driving around, waking up at dawn, paying thousands to come to Africa. We were all there for one reason—we were hoping (and I was praying) to get a look to see just one of these animals—even if it was from a long distance!

Now imagine if while we are gazing and ooohing and awing and snapping pictures, a gorgeous and majestic giraffe was thinking to herself, “Just look at me! Why does my neck have to be so long? How embarrassing that I have to spread my legs apart just to get a drink of water! And all these brown spots . . . why can’t I have a gorgeous coat like that Miss Leopard over there!”

Then, along walks an incredible and highly endangered white rhino who says, “I can’t believe I got my mother’s long nose, it’s so embarrassing, and her overly large rear-end too—it’s huge! Why does my skin have to be this dark and leathery? Why can’t my skin be soft like Miss Leopard?”

Once again, remember, people from all around the world travel to Africa to wake up before dawn, drive around for hours, and do their best to take pictures of every angle of a rhino, whether it’s her large bottom or hoping to get that snapshot of her side view to show the beautiful length of that nose!

Everyone dreams of seeing a giraffe drinking from a watering hole, with her legs spread due to her long legs and long neck. We would be thrilled if we could ever get close enough to see the long black tongue. We would take picture after picture to show everyone we know and post them all over social media.

When I shared this story with the ladies in South Africa that same week, one precious friend told me later that the next morning, she stood and looked at herself in the mirror and said she actually liked what she saw. For the first time, she was looking through the eyes of her Beloved! I shared it again a few weeks later at a conference in Nairobi, Kenya, where African women had traveled from several different African countries.

Though I wasn’t there long enough to speak to anyone after the conference (since I had to catch a plane to speak in Amsterdam), I saw the truth transform these beautiful ladies. When I looked into their faces, I could see they were beaming with joy, and many women had hot tears streaming down their cheeks. All I’d done was ask Him His opinion along with a way to explain it to other women. Then I also asked for an opportunity to share what He’d told me—you, darling, can do the same thing with anything you are concerned or troubled about.

If what I’ve shared has touched you, please share this story with other women and the girls you know or meet. Let them know how God sees us—rare, unique, and endangered—because there’s only one of each of us, and that’s another reason why He asks us to be fruitful and multiply! Begin to "Sweet Dreams" about having precious children who will look like you, your future husband, and both your families! 

Remember, your Father, God, is just waiting to give you wisdom to help you so you can help others after discovering the truth. It’s asking Him whenever you have a need, hurt, or question. Talk to Him constantly, then listen to how He explains it. And then ask Him to allow you to pass His loving message to women after you ask Him to show you who needs to hear it.

Get the Picture?

Hopefully, you get the picture. But just in case, when I was telling this story to one of my gorgeous granddaughters, my Best Friend gave me a picture of another analogy.

Just consider all the different breeds of dogs! Immediately, we began to laugh, thinking of some of the “uglies” breeds of dogs that we see as adorable! As I was telling my granddaughter, some have a pushed-in nose that looks like they ran into a wall, while some have oversized, huge, long ears, and then there are some that have short, stubby legs. As before, let’s take a moment to listen in on what they might think if they were human beings.

“It’s so humiliating having these long ears,” the beagle thinks, “Oh, why can’t I have cute pointed ears like that tiny chihuahua?” While the chihuahua thinks, “I am so short, I’m too thin, and I just wish I could grow my hair long like the Yorkshire Terrier.” The German Shepherd who feels she’s got the perfect length fur says, “Yeah, but I hate my oily fur. When someone pets me, I’m humiliated, so I try to avoid people, but that makes me feel lonely and unloved.”

The truth is, our opinions of how we look are not how the Lord looks at any of us and how most people see us. The people who belittle you often do it because they hurt and feel insecure.

Remember, we are all on God’s endangered list since no two of us are alike, and few women are brave enough to “be fruitful and multiple”! It was God’s perfect plan to create each of us in all shapes and colors so we could learn to appreciate all varieties. Can you imagine how boring the world would be if God created us all the same? Different cultures have different ideas of true beauty, but the Lord, God, made them all. God said we were made in His image, so how can we pick apart His handiwork and accept the lies that the most insecure spread because they, themselves, feel so inferior? The enemy comes to “steal, kill, and destroy” us.

“It’s my duty to make sure that Satan does not win even a small victory over us, for we don’t want to be naïve, ignorant, unaware and then fall prey to his evil schemes.” 2 Corinthians 2:11

Our Creator (and our Best Friend) loves our side view, hair, skin shade, and texture—especially the imperfections we believe we see in our looks. The Lord loves how tall or short we are. He even likes the extra weight that we’ve put on.

If you struggle with feeling you’re too fat, just imagine seeing a skinny animal and how horrified and heartbroken you would feel if you saw an animal who was not eating because she felt she was fat!

Since feeling overweight seems to be an obsession for most women, if you struggle like most of us and are currently heavier than you’d like to be, I spoke to Him about that, too! Here’s how He assured me that no matter how much I weigh, I’m still absolutely beautiful.

While I was in Italy, He pointed out how the greatest and most famous artists painted and sculpted very large, curvy women! Even their backsides were considered beautiful when quite large and full. Yet here we are, playing right into the hands of the enemy who loves to make us feel as if we fall short of being beautiful. By whose standards? Not the Lord’s, and whose opinion matters most?

Why do we care about our outer beauty anyway when we know that “Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised” (Proverbs 31:30)? Let go of the obsession over how we look and be determined to “smile at the future.” Let’s agree to stop looking in the mirror and focusing on what you and I don’t like. Begin to “think of others as more important than ourselves” and look for attributes that will last. “Goodness, kindness, patience.”

If it’s becoming older that’s troubling you, He lovingly reminded me when He said this, “Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day.” “Therefore, we do not become discouraged [spiritless, disappointed, or afraid]. Though our outer self is [progressively] wasting away, yet our inner self is being [progressively] renewed day by day. For our momentary, light distress [this passing trouble] is producing for us an eternal weight of glory [a fullness] beyond all measure [surpassing all comparisons, a transcendent splendor, and an endless blessedness]! So we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are unseen; for the things which are visible are temporal [just brief and fleeting], but the things which are invisible are everlasting and imperishable.” 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Now, as an older, wiser woman, I’m excited to be entering my 70s and heartbroken when I hear older women who are desperately trying to look younger. They talk about having facelifts or eyelifts, avoiding the sun, and eating food that doesn’t keep them feeling good or healthy—but keeps them thinner, which makes them look older.

What I’ve asked God is to help me grow older graciously and gracefully. Rather than being fearful about getting old, I am fascinated by the aging process. The world is not my home, I am just passing through on a journey to a “new heaven and a new earth” and a body that is perfect. https://biblehub.com/philippians/3-21.htm

Interestingly, when I tell people my age, they’re always shocked, saying they thought I was years younger. My beauty secret is: “They looked to Him and were radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed.” Psalm 34:5. So make sure all the older women in your life, like your mothers and grandmothers, know how beautiful you see them because they might not realize that their kindness, smile, love, and warmth make them so beautiful. 

Pretty Muscular

I’d also like to discuss something new that’s happened only in the last few years. Another phenomenon has taken me by surprise: the trend for women to work out or train to the point of looking as muscular as a young man. Throughout this book, I’ve taught you how important it is to celebrate how God created us female. And there’s no better way than feeling feminine.

Sadly, rather than wanting to feel and look feminine, women are working hard to look “pretty muscular.” Not only does this excessive training produce well-defined and bulky muscles, which were once reserved for men, but when women train to this extent, it often reduces the breast tissue and interferes with a woman’s monthly cycle. Is this honoring and celebrating how we were created as women? Would an overly muscular woman be easily viewed as His bride and feel feminine as God intended?

On the other hand, should God have created you to be more muscular or masculine-looking, don’t let the enemy use this to confuse you. Beware of the slippery slope in today’s society that goes beyond accepting who a person is. It now promotes a way of living contrary to the Abundant Life He died to give us. He died so we could enjoy being who we were created to be—a woman, His bride.

How He and We See You

While in Brazil, I had a hostess who continually said to me, “Linda, linda, linda,” which in Portuguese means “Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.” Precious one, that’s what your Lover, your Heavenly Husband, your Best Friend says each time He looks at you! He just can’t keep His eyes off you, and His love grows with each glance.

There is no need to work out or change who you are since you are “Linda” Beautiful— His cherished and beautiful bride, “If you do not know, most beautiful of women . . . How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful!” Song of Solomon 1:8, 15

Remember, He bought you for a price, not so you could sell yourself short and be slaves of the enemy who taunts you when you compare yourself to someone else (who very often is also insecure and uses filters so she feels better about herself). Ask Him what He sees when He looks at you. What are His favorite features? If I had to guess, He loves your kindness, patience, and gentleness. He loves how you care about others, wondering how they’re feeling so you have no time to think about yourself.

Don’t Be Ugly

In the South (the southern parts of the United States), there’s a “saying” mothers use to correct their children’s behavior. They say, “Don’t be ugly” when someone is unkind to another person. I adopted this saying because it’s the truth. There are girls and women who can have flawless hair, makeup, expensive clothes, and a perfect figure. But they’re unkind, selfish, and rude. Ultimately, they are ugly because the heart of the person shines through.

One of the most influential women in my life was my grandmother. She was more precious to me because I didn’t have a grandmother until I got married, and I believe that because I waited so long, I got the best. Everyone called her Great Grandma Brown because she was a great woman! I felt so special because I was hers; I was her granddaughter, and wanted to be just like her.

Yet, if someone looked at her physically, she wouldn’t be considered beautiful in any way, shape, or form. This sweet woman had huge eczema scabs that flaked all over her body. She had horribly thick glasses and huge hearing aids. She was neither tall nor thin, and yet—she was gorgeous! Everyone was drawn to her and would say she was the most beautiful person they’d ever met!

Dearest daughter, no matter your outer appearance, your humble, gentle, and kind spirit will always shine through. Open your mouth with only kind words and love others enough not to be offended by their verbal vomit.

Have compassion for those who are sick in their hearts and are unable to control what they spew out of their mouths, infecting the innocent. Care for those who are so unfortunate by not taking their words to heart. Do as our Savior did, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”