Healing wounds caused by my parents divorce.

Shared by Poppy in Costa Rica:

Dear ladies,
Some days ago, I received the suggestion from our main Minister to share my journey as a child who went through my parents divorce when I was a little girl of just 5 years old.
I must tell you that the time has passed and I am now in the mature age of the 50's and I stilll have many wounds that need to be healed.
I was asking my Husband to show me where to start with this until today it happened something unexpected that can only come from him.
While working today, I got a call from my mum telling me that she had no electricity and was not able to have any breakfast. I was in a meeting but asked her to wait for me so we can go together to get some food for her. After finishing my meeting, I drove to her place and as you know you can plan as much as you want, but our Beloved has always the last word.
She requested me to take her to her best friend house (2hours driving from home) to check on her. I was not prepared for that, but because she had no electricity I took her there. This lady has 85 years old and she was at home with her husband and one of her daughters and as you can imagine we grew up together so we shared many things of our youth. Going from one topic to another, she asked me about my father, and this brought tears and pain to my heart today.
My father passed away almost 12 years ago and I was outside the country when he died. The day that it happened I called my mum just to check that everything was fine and although she knew my father passed away, she decided not to mention anything to me. Meaning that I found out one week after when He was buried.
Time passed, and then I realized that most of my father family members were shocked that I did not attend to the burial ceremony because they were not told I was outside the country and I was considered the worst daughter a father could have ever had. Which hurt me a lot.
Time continued to pass and I was able later to talk to my father's sister (my aunt) and she shared with me that my father was very hurt with me because I did not invite him to my wedding and he had everything ready to walk me through the altar, which never happened.
Why this is so painful because I have hidden all this in my heart for so many years. So let me try to put all together. Because my parents were divorced and my father married the OW, my mum gave me no option about who would be the person to be in my wedding, making sure that if my father was there she would not attend and because I was living with her and she did all she could on her own to raise me, then inviting my father was out of question.
Now, when my father passed away, my older sister called my mum to give the news and the same day I called her from outside the country but my mum decided not to say anything, giving me no option at all to return to the country the following day.
I have always felt guilty of causing that pain to my father but at that time I felt I had no choice. it has been difficult to understand why you have to choose between your parents in something so special for a kid, but I am no body to question my mum or my Beloved, so although I was very far from knowing my Husband as I do now, I decided to forgive my mum for the decisions she made in both situations. I wanted to be free of any bitterness that could damage my soul, but I still feel pain with just the thought.
I wished my parents had a good relationship between them so I was not in the middle of all this, but that was not the case. I am opening my hear as a child who went through parents divorce who is still holding pain in my heart of because it. If you are going through divorce or it is final already, seek your Heavenly Husband for wisdom so you always have a cordial relationship with your Former husband in order to avoid suffering or pain with some of the decisions that your flesh want to make. This is protect your kids heart in so many ways, that you could not even imagine.