Chapter 4 Two-Edged Sword

What we say is powerful. Remember, God simply spoke the entire world into existence. And if that were not enough, the Lord told us that we would be judged by every word we say. Yet, even though we see this is true, why are we bombarded as the entire world, including the church and other Christians, tells us to speak our minds? Let’s search to discover the Source of truth. What does God have to say?

The Tongue: Small, Yet Deadly!

Set on fire by hell. "It is the same with our tongue. It is a small part of the body, but it can boast about doing great things. A big forest fire can be started with only a little flame. The tongue is like a fire. It is a world of evil among the parts of our body. It spreads its evil through our whole body and starts a fire that influences all of life. It gets this fire from hell" (James 3:5-6).

No one can tame the tongue. ” But no one can control the tongue. It is wild and evil, full of deadly poison. We use our tongues to praise our Lord and Father, but then we curse people who were created by God in His likeness. These praises and curses come from the same mouth. My brothers and sisters, this should not happen. Do good water and bad water flow from the same spring? Of course not" (James 3:8-11). 

We need a muzzle! “I told myself, 'I'll be careful not to sin by what I say, and I'll muzzle my mouth when certain people are near” (Psalm 39:1). You may boast about having great physical strength, but how about the greater strength of self-control?

Crushes the spirit. “A soothing tongue [speaking words that build up and encourage] is a tree of life, but a perversive tongue [speaking words that overwhelm and depress] crushes the spirit" (Proverbs 15:4). All of us have been on the receiving end of cruel words and know how it effects us, sometimes for years. As a Wise Warrior, you must show your full strength by how you refuse to say anything that is less than reflects a man of God.

God tells us to CHOOSE our words wisely.

Guard your mouth. How many times have you gotten into trouble for what you have said? “Honest people speak sensibly, but deceitful liars will be silenced" (Proverbs 10:31). “The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing” (Proverbs 12:18).“Whoever controls his tongue keeps himself out of trouble” (Proverbs 21:23).

Sweetness of speech. If you have hurt someone with what you have said, God is faithful to offer a cure. “Gracious, kind and pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones and health to the body” (Proverbs 16:24). Besides, “Sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness” (Proverbs 16:21).

Grow up. One of the biggest lies we learned as children is, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” As I said before, we all have experienced unkind, foolish words that were vomited out at us as children. So it's time to grow up. “When I was a child, I used to speak as a child, think as a child, reason as a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things” (1 Corinthians 13:11).

Beware of how MUCH you say.

Too many words. “With many words, wrongdoing is unavoidable” (Proverbs 10:19). It's been said that God gave us two ears and only one mouth, so listen twice as much as you speak.

Guards his mouth. Everyone tells us to speak our minds and say what we think, and now it's all about sharing how we feel—but God says: “A man of understanding keeps silent” (Proverbs 11:12). He also says, “One who guards his mouth preserves his life; one who opens it comes to ruin” (Proverbs 13:3). Feelings are fleeting. Never speak when you are dealing with negative feelings. Wait until you are thinking clearly, no matter how much you're goaded into speaking—most often by the females in your life—the very ones who will be most hurt and have the hardest time getting over their hurts. It's the way God created them as the "weaker vessel" (verse)

Considered wise. “Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise. When he closes his lips, he is regarded as sensible and a man of understanding” (Proverbs 17:28).

Anything more. “But let your answer be, ‘Yes, yes’ or ‘No, no’—anything beyond these is of evil” (Matthew 5:37). Nod your head when people talk to you so the person knows you've heard and understand. 

Be content, and stop grumbling.

Do all things . . .“Do all things without complaining or arguing” (Philippians 2:14). 

Content in all circumstances. “Not that I speak from want; for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am” (Philippians 4:11). 

Great gain. Godliness and contentment go hand in hand. “But godliness is actually a means of great gain when paired with contentment” (1 Timothy 6:6).

Be Content “. . . being content with what you have; for He Himself has said, ‘I will never fail you. I will never abandon you’” (Hebrews 13:5). Are you content with what you have, or are you constantly trying to upgrade all your “toys” and possessions?

What is so important about being agreeable?

Agree. “Agree with thine adversary, opponent, enemy quickly, settle your differences, before you are dragged into court” (Matthew 5:25). Listening and nodding your head, again, will help a lot when someone is angry or frustrated. Give the other person a chance to share their thoughts, feelings, and frustrations. Get on their side. Don’t fuel the fire. Later, once they feel they have been heard and understood, they may be open-minded to your pointing out a different view. Humility will quiet a person who is out of control and proves your spiritual maturity.

Honorable. “Keeping away from strife is an honor for a man, but any fool will quarrel” (Proverbs 20:3).

Agreement. The enemy loves to divide and conquer, but God says, “Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven” (Matthew 18:19). When we don’t agree as a family or couple, we actually cancel each other out. “So refuse foolish and ignorant assumptions knowing that they produce quarrels. And the Lord’s bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged” (2 Timothy 2:23).

Slow to anger. You have heard people say that Jesus was angry and turned over the tables in the temple so that we can be angry. But God says, “But let everyone be quick to hear; slow to speak, and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God” (See Chapter 6, “Angry Man,” for more knowledge.)

What does God think of lying besides the fact that He hates it?

What the Lord hates. “There are six things which the Lord hates, yes, seven which are an abomination to Him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood (lives of the unborn) . . .” (Proverbs 6:16–17). 

Deceitful. “Deliver my soul, O Lord, from lying lips, from a deceitful tongue” (Psalm 120:2).

Father of lies. And lastly, we never want to lie since the devil is the father of lies, and lying is an abomination to God. “You are of your father the devil, and you want to do the desires of your father. He was a murderer from the beginning and does not stand in the truth because there is no truth in him. Whenever he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own nature; for he is a liar, and the father of lies” (John 8:44). Remember, it’s God's Truth that sets you free!

Your tongue will be much harder to control if you're intoxicated.

Not wise. “Wine is a mocker, strong drink a brawler, and whoever is intoxicated by it is not wise” (Proverbs 20:1). Drinking alcohol is not in itself a sin. It is the evil that you're unable to control, like what you speak and other consequences.

Utter perverse things. “Who has woe? Who has sorrow? Who has contentions? Who has complaining? Who has wounds without cause? Who has redness of eyes? Those who linger long over wine, those who go to taste mixed wine. Do not look on the wine when it is red, when it sparkles in the cup, when it goes down smoothly; at the last it bites like a serpent, and stings like a viper. Your eyes will see strange things, and your mind will utter perverse things. And you will be like one who lies down in the middle of the sea, or like one who lies down on the top of a mast. ‘They struck me, but I did not become ill; they beat me, but I did not know it. When shall I awake? I will seek another drink’” (Proverbs 23:29–35). A person who drinks a lot is not an “alcoholic.” Drinking to excess is not a disease; it’s a sin. Therefore, confess your sin and he will set you free. If you stumble, the remedy is to continue to confess and cry out to God.

Proceeds out. “Not what enters into the mouth defiles the man, but what proceeds out of the mouth, this defiles the man” (Matthew 15:11). 

To Sum Up

1. Be aware of how much you say—with many words, mischief is unavoidable. Instead, let your communication be “Yes, yes” or “No, no”—anything more than this will lead to evil.

2.  Be careful what you say—by your words, you’ll be justified, and by your words, you’ll be condemned!

3.  Do not argue—agree with your adversary quickly!

4.  Learn to be content in whatever circumstances you are in.

5.  Help to heal with pleasant words that are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones, and the sweetness of speech adds persuasiveness.

Let us all strive to appear wise by keeping silent. Let our words be kind and patient.